Coming out is possibly
one of the scariest things you may ever
have to do. Sure, there isn’t anything
or anyone that says you have to do it.
Many people under the LGBT rainbow never
do and still live happy lives. However,
the down side of living in the closet
is that you always have to worry about
being outed or found out. Talk about scary!
If you know in your heart and mind that
you are living your life in the body of
the opposite gender, you will probably
get to the point where you have to do
something about it. Unlike a cross dresser,
a truly transgender person is typically
troubled by the fact that their mind and
body do not match, and often feel as if
they are a “walking lie.”
Usually the most desired solution for
gender dysphoria is to fully transition
your body to match your gender identity.
Once you know for a fact that you indeed
are transgender, coming out is the first
step in your journey to full transition.
Easier said than done, right? You’ve
probably asked yourself “How do
I get the courage,” “Who do
I tell first,” and “What will
everyone think?” Many, who are overwhelmed
by fear, even try to deny our reality.
At best, this is only temporary. However,
over time this denial can manifest itself
as substance or emotional addictions,
and in some extreme cases, even suicide
as a means to escape the truth.
So where do you start? My advice is to
first find a counselor or psychologist
and set up an appointment. Just about
all health plans cover mental health issues
and have an adequate number of professionals
to see. If you’re young and still
living at home, you can ask your parents
or guardian to set up a session for you
without telling them the precise issue
by telling them that you aren’t
feeling like yourself and that it would
really help you to talk to someone. Once
you’re in the counselor’s
office, it’s natural to be nervous.
Remember, you have never told anyone your
secret before. But rest assured, your
case is not going to be the first time
that they have heard of gender dysphoria,
and you’re not going to freak them
out. It will be good to have an impartial
person that you can discuss these things
with in confidence. The most important
role that they will play is to determine
whether or not you are truly transgender.
Until you know for sure, you cannot take
the next step in your transition path.
Plus, why would you come out to anyone
else until you are sure yourself? A mental
health professional will work with you
and talk with you to discover your true
self. The up side to all this is that
in a weird way, the pressure is off you.
All you need to do is be open and honest
with your counselor and leave it up to
him or her to give their assessment.
If you are declared gender dysphoric
by your counselor, congratulations! You
have taken the difficult first step to
being the person you are meant to be.
You may at this point feel it’s
time to come out to your best friend(s)
and start building a small group of supportive
friends to help you through this. Yes,
again this is very scary. But you didn’t
come out all by yourself and declare yourself
transgender; a health professional has
determined that with you.
The good news is that the TG community
is slowly gaining acceptance as the world
has become more aware of what it means
to be transgender. In the past, there
has been a lot of shame associated with
this issue, but thanks to support from
the LGBT community and a growing online
community, it is becoming easier to be
your true self.
NOTE: The thoughts and advice offered
on this page
are not meant to take the place of meeting
with a
qualified professional.
|
